Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
by oflettersandwords
Summary: This is a oneshot from Total's POV. It's kind of a missing moment from an upcoming fic of mine, but it can be read alone. Total's basically reflecting on missing Akila among...other things. T for some innuendos. Constructive criticism is well deserved.


I sighed _again_, but they ignored me. How cruel. First they leave my darling Akila behind, and now they won't even let me complain about it. Max threatened to get me a muzzle if I wouldn't stop. Honestly – a _muzzle_! How barbaric!

They didn't care about that though; the only thing they cared about was saving the world. Sure, sure, that's all good and well, but can't we do that _with_ Akila?

Apparently not. They had forced my poor love to stay back with Max's mom and sister, Dr. Martinez and Ella, and their _dog_ Magnolia. Poor Akila, a purebred like her stuck with such poor company.

I wasn't any better off, truth be told. I was on the run with a bunch of teenage criminal mutants who were trying to find other branches of Itex to destroy. They couldn't even take a break to go to all the amazing attractions that we were missing. We passed over SeaWorld once and Max wouldn't even let us stop there. We could have seen Shamu! But _no_, Max wouldn't let us, because we have to save the world. In my opinion, Shamu is a lot cooler than the world.

Oh, well, I've gone off on a bit of a tangent haven't I? I've been hanging out with Nudge too much. She and Angel are the only ones that let me wallow in my misery about having to leave Akila behind. Everyone else just finds it annoying.

Well, they don't know what it's like to love someone! Especially when that someone never notices you! Well, I suppose Fang might know what it's like, but he never talks to me so I wouldn't be able to find out, and I would bet he would get very mad at me if I ever brought it up.

But, I mean, come on, everyone can tell he's in love with Max. Even Iggy can tell and he's blind.

Hm… speaking of Iggy, I could really go for one of his cinnamon buns right now. He made them once when we were staying at Dr. M's and they were the most _delicious_ things I have ever tasted. Oh, now my mouth's watering. What was I talking about before Iggy's phenomenal cinnamon buns?

Oh, right, Max and Fang. Everyone can tell that they're in love with each other. Well, except them, I guess. They really are oblivious to each other. And, according to my sources, they've kissed three times. You would think they would get the message by now. And I heard that Max even told Fang that she loved him when she was getting her chip taken out.

Mm, chips. I could go for some chips right now. Or, as they call them in England, crisps. I wish we could go visit England. Or France, again. France was fun. And they let me go into the restaurants and shops there. Max is one who could definitely use another trip to France. They had the best clothes, and I'm sure if we had stayed there another day Nudge and I would've been able to get her into a mini-skirt.

Wait- what am I doing? I'm thinking about skirts when my poor Akila is stuck in Arizona while we're flying all over the place. My poor darling is probably burning up in Arizona. She's so used to the cold weather that the heat is probably ten times as bad for her. And her beautiful, shiny, long coat can't do anything to help her. She'll probably have to get it shaved. Wow, I wonder how she would look – No, I won't think like that; I'll be a gentleman when thinking of my love. She would never even glance at me if she heard what I had just been thinking.

I hope Angel didn't hear what I was thinking either. That would be bad. And then Max would find out and start going on about how what I was thinking was sexist and degrading. I bet if she started going out with Fang that she would be a lot nicer. I bet she would start dressing like a girl, too. Who would be sexist and degrading then, huh? It would be her! I bet Fang would have her flying around in low-cut tank-tops and mini-skirts. And knowing him he would probably be looking up those mini-skirts.

Really, he needs to get his mind out of the gutter. _Especially_ with a six-year-old mind-reader around. Angel has told me about some of his daydreams – or should I say _fantasies_? – that he has when we're flying. _Those_ would offend a woman. It's a good think Max can't read his mind or he would be single forever. It's a really good think she actually sleeps when he's on watch too. Angel's told me that sometimes she can't even sleep because of how loud he's fantasizing. I feel bad for her – that's got to be scarring.

At least he'll eventually win over Max, and probably get to fulfill some of his testosterone-induced daydreams. But me – I'll never win over Akila. Especially when we're not even in the same place!

"Oh, _woe_ is me! How I miss you, Akila!" I cried out in anguish. "I miss you so! It's not my fault that I've left you! It was these _scoundrels_ – they made me!"

"Total, you are making my ears _bleed_," Iggy said, trying to make me stop.

"Too, bad! You'll never know how much it pains me to be away from her! You don't know true love!" I wailed in agony.

"Shut _up_!" Fang all but growled from next to Max, looking back at me with a glare.

"And you! At least you'll have a chance at love – at fulfilling your oh-so-disturbing teenage fantasies! But me, I won't have that when I'm halfway across the continent from my love!" I noticed Fang blushing and Max giving him a look, but I didn't comment on it. Iggy burst out laughing as I continued crying out in anguish.

"Akila! Oh, Akila, how I miss you!" I sobbed.

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder, Total," Max said.

"Hell yeah," Fang muttered.

Max glared at him, then continued. "The chances that Akila will like you more when we get back are very high. So quit complaining," Max said, scowling at me.

"Well, I suppose your right. Absence _does_ make the heart grow fonder. And my heart is growing fonder by the second for my dear Akila!"

* * *

**A/N- I really, really like this. =) Hehe, Total's POV. This was fun. This was very, very fun. =) And this is also what happens when I am sleep-deprived. c(= Tell me what you think, please. Construstive criticism is very much welcomed. And I like having grammar or spelling mistakes pointed out. =)**


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